By Rui Diniz
Freedom is the key word that most attracts souls to begin the study of Gnosis, that ineffable understanding that in leaps and bounds emerges when conditions allow it. The choice of a set path or of an adventurous individual journey is, in itself, already potentially a liberating event, but the freedom that is expected at the start of it, may not be exactly the Freedom found in Truth and Life, when experienced, even if briefly. Is one able to cast aside the preconceptions about what freedom is or what we believe it to be, to be able to observe what it seems to really be in Truth? It takes courage, I presume, for starters. Then it takes also the profound understanding (which I found not to be as easy to have as at first it seems) that NOTHING of the Truth can be understood by the minds generated in these Frankenstein-animated dead bodies of ours.
A brain of death can only understand death, because it bears the curse of time and its synapses only read what they can sense and compare to their illusory sense receptors. So, to be able to try to grasp any kind of glimpse of Truth, we have to first accept that we will only be able to create comparisons, some as cheap a copy as our animated necromantic dwelling here are, on this frontier hell. Also, we need to accept that Truth is not infected by Time, it simply IS and, therefore, it is Truth, immutable, eternal and uncreated. When anything changes over time, this means that it is not ultimately True and, therefore, it is part of Death and Falsehood. Our minds, like the rest, are made in His False image and, therefore, suffer from the same lack, that can only be compensated by an understanding that can only ever be, like previously mentioned, ineffable.
Freedom is taken to be what, then? Free will? But free will to do what? To be what? To try this and that and the other? To accumulate experiences? Experience is truly a rich treasure, but only for the Living inhabiting Death and only while the Living are stuck there, looking for a way out. So that is not yet freedom – it might be a liberating movement towards it, at most, but as the mental landscape changes along the way, it also dies. And as one strives, one remains imprisoned.
Is freedom, then, the power to be whatever one decides? But what if what one decides is not True and merely illusory – even if this crippled perception tells us otherwise? Is freedom power, then? Here in hell, the archons hold most power, even if it is only ephemeral. Are archons free? No, quite the opposite, archons are absolute slaves of their own nature, just like their minion humans who have no higher spirit to connect to – they are dead awaiting death in tic-toc, tic-toc, tic-toc.
Here, we can only get to glimpse Truth by inferring what it is not – and Freedom is Truth, but not necessarily the truth we like or think we would have preferred.
I infer, then, that freedom is the ability to recognize one’s absolute place in whatever the True timeless cosmos is, where rules and laws and discipline are an essential part of existence, as needed in Truth as our current body organs are needed to sustain this animated death. This is why Sophia fell, in my opinion – she left her rightful place in freedom to do and be something else, and as she did, she lost her Freedom. But then again, maybe all True beings, like Sophia, need to fall in Falsehood at some point, to transform within Truth – to, consequently, transform their Freedom.
Wisdom is connected with Freedom, but not in a linear way; not coming from one to reach the other, but one being the foundation and a key part of the other.
The thing is, we are unable to recognize our absolute place. After all, the only way for our higher spirit to have anything resembling a peek of direct experience is if the material parts we occupy are silenced, numbed or, at least, distracted.
We can, however, practice a state of understanding of what Truth certainly IS-NOT and, as such, chip away all that is false, through sheer observation. The ego becomes restless with this exercise, because it somehow senses the danger this represents to itself – to its own False existence. Given that the ego is primarily programmed by its creator, the Demiurge, to be absolutely addicted to survival, it will then act as an existence junkie, using all the tricks it can find and make use of, regardless of morality, honesty or authenticity, to ensure its continued survival and perceived comfort. Through it, the archons experience, feed and live on. It is like a wild animal that became civilized in clothing and mannerism only. All false life is addicted to existing formally, only because form is the only existence available for falsehood.
Do not get me wrong – I am just the messenger, as scared and as blessed as any of you – for the ego’s animal can be truly tamed and accept its dissolution in the end, just as the Demiurge will “one day” understand it is merely a shadow, an abortion, a nightmare, and accept its ultimate fate, the fate of all that is cursed with time. In the same way that Yaldabaoth (who is Sophia’s shadow!) refused its place in Truth and proclaimed to his minions:
«Here at least we shall be free;
the Almighty hath not built
Here for his envy, will not drive us hence:
Here we may reign secure, and in my choice
to reign is worth ambition though in Hell:
Better to reign in Hell, than serve in Heaven.»
“Here at least we shall be free”?
Ah! Such nonsense, such blindness from the blind god.
We have a Place, but in service, in True symbiosis with one another, in a divine coexistence that beckons discipline as a part of our nature. But that Place is not this place, nor will it ever be. This cyclic rotating drum of a washing machine goes through its program, as it tries to wash away ourselves from Ourselves, tumbling and tumbling, despite our resistance. In the end our laundry will be put out to dry and, if we are lucky (if luck is anything more than misperception of True Self communication) be carried away by the winds of Truth and Life – away from here, away from all that is Hell, away from the Lake of the Abyss where we lie submerged and dead, drowned in the Pool of Terrors whose tide comes and goes, comes and goes, comes and goes…
We have a Place in the joy of service, of immortal admiration; in the joy of the exaltation brought about by sharing True Life; in the Freedom of being exactly Who and What we are meant to be, no less – but first we must understand that “less” in death may very well be “more” in Life – unlike the consideration of the blind god, Samael, as he thought that to serve in Heaven was to be reduced.
We will not reach Freedom while we keep seeking it – for seeking requires motion and motion requires time and time is nothing but death delayed! – and yet, we are unable to ever reach it unless we seek! But ah! We may reach Freedom when, while seeking it, we finally realize that in that act, we have been running from Freedom all along… while the archons in our ego sought to survive, they fooled us. As we seek, we move and while we move “they live, we sleep”. Do not doubt and seek, and recognise when the moment arrives to stay your search for the Truth, to allow Truth to seek you.
Just be still, in the river of your time, and allow flowing towards the Sea of Life.
Stand atop of the Hill and see the city lights, as time stands still, resigned to keep in silence and shut, away from “friends” who’d think you nut, and go back Home!
«When illusion spin her net
I’m never where I want to be
And liberty she pirouette
When I think that I am free
Watched by empty silhouettes
Who close their eyes but still can see
No one taught them etiquette
I will show another me
Today I don’t need a replacement
I’ll tell them what the smile on my face meant
My heart going boom, boom, boom
“Hey”, I said, “you can keep my things, they’ve come to take me home”»
Do not interfere with the signs YOU sent yourself, listen to the Bird’s Song… and let death be gone, exorcised from you, acceptingly, as you emerge from from the waters, baptized in Truth, Reborn Above.